twoo days in a row what are the chances!!! Anyways what a day.  Today will forever be in my memory banks, and should be in yours too.  Today Nick and Abby moved into Anna and I's apartment (since we won't be moving in till november).  This is a momentous (sp) occasion because they have never had thier own place so now they can enjoy life in thier own apartment...praise the Lord!  And be in prayer for them if you would, that their support would continue to increase and for an apartment to open up soon for them to move into. And this helps Anna and I because we needed some help with the rent since we arn't going to be living thier till november.  Really quick I want to say a huge thank you to Binger, Micheal, Dave, Sara (hope thats how you spell it), and everyone else who was able to help us get them moved in, believe it or not you were not just helping nick and abby but you were helping anna and I as well, so Thank you Very much!

 Now for the second reason today is momentious.  Jo and Jerry's house was thier house for about 3 hours (I believe that is a record!!) today between the time Nick and Abby were successfully moved out and my SMOKIN' HOT fiance moved in.  Thats right Anna is no longer at clestas apartment (which is kind of a bummer because the Lord knows how much i am going to miss getting my cardio workout going up to that third floor apartment).  She now resides for the next 97 days at the Beerman household.  That said, I want to say thank you to clesta for openning up her abode to Anna.  You have no idea how much of a blessing for us both it was for her to be able to live on her own while we were dating.  Priceless as they say ( just so that ya know we will get you back for your generosity). Thank you soo much!

That is all for me...untill next time xangaland!

Below is a rant that i wrote a couple months ago, it seems like forever.  It was protected but now I feel that you all should see it...its very honest so yeah.

also here is a little update on my life.  Things are going really well.  Money is tight as usual, and with wedding plans, foc shows, curbside shows, pit stuff, etc...I am feeling alittle stretched hence the reason it has been so long since my last post.  that is all. I love everone of you guys very much!

additionally, I have started today rereading all my previous posts and comments.  its kinda sweet to see all that has happened since june 03'  I wan't to encourage all you you to do the same...otherwise what is this online journal stuff really about if we don't look back.

THE prayer RANT

  Lord there are soo many things in this world that I am sick of:

I am sick of the "I'm ok, your not ok mentality".  We try soo hard to maintain the appearance/illussion of having our shit together, we don't realize we are making others think they have to do the same.   It is easier to point out the speck in thier eyes, than it is to remove the speck from your own eyes.  We believe if we didn't do certain things then God will somehow love us more.  I know the truth!  Perfection is never the requierment.  It is very humbling to think that after all I have done for You Lord that you would accept the murderer on the corner as quickly as You have me.  Those who recieve salvation on thier death beds having lived a life of gluttony, will still recieve the same reward as those who recieve Him in thier childhood.  This reveals Your gracious character to me, and more importantly, at this time, shows me beyound a shadow of doubt that Your Grace is not based on our works or how well our lives are ordered, but on our faith alone.  Lord, You have blessed me with this wisdom, please help others to see Your Gracious character, and remind us of this truth; You like to use weak vessels.  Your word says when we are weak You are strong.

I am sick of my best never being enough for my brothers.  I wish it were enough for others, to just know I have the same heart for You as they do.  We all want to see things grow, and the kingdom advance.  Alot of the service I do is not out of my heart for You it is out of a fear of rejection from my peers.  It is out of compultion, not passion.  I know this ought not be.  My works Lord, are not for my saved peers, they are for the unbelieving world to see.  Lord help me know how to handle the judgment of other believers.  Give me assurance, knowing that it is not in them that my salvation lies and bring them to a deeper understanding of Your character.  Allow my stance to be strong and bold in confrontation of judgment, in all truth and love.

I am sick of struggling with sexual purity.  Constantly going from sobriety to full blown addiction.  They say when bones break and mend they mend together stronger. My fear is that the opposite is occuring.  I feel like I am in the middle of a war where both sides gain ground just to lose it again...the only thing is that the side i really want to win, is becoming weary and won't hold out another battle.  DADDY!! Please lift me from this blood stained feild, where angles good, and bad, have fought and died, and give strength to me and conquer my enemies.

I am sick of hearing, feeling, and even seeing your power amidst me, but never in me!  Oh Lord, I speak with all my being and ask for your power, strength, perseverance, patience, peace, joy, and love to consume me completely.  I want to quite doing the things I know not to do.  I know who You are!  I have tasted of your presence. I have heard Your voice. I have seen you awesome power displayed in creation and miracles.  Now me Lord!  Lord me!  I want to see this power in my life.  right down to it no restraints.  I want You to remove my addiction to pornography, masterbation, and nicotine.  I want to be an example of Your might Lord, for all to see, but just for me is just fine.

Teaching at Pit tomorrow...really nervous even though i have taught this lesson once before.  Actually, it was the last lesson i taught...thats odd.  I think it is a great lesson, I am really excited! Anyways, nm happening here. just thought i would hop on and post alittle.

oh yeah, been awhile but that goes without saying.  alot has changed...my work situation is continuing to become more interesting. I am learning alot about the business.  handing out cards and talking about advertising, reading instilation manuals for automatic doors these are some of the duties of being a "door and glass man."  I think I like it.

Lot is changing with pcm too.  For example we are moving in march.  rent has increased at our current location.  this may seem like a very bad thing, but really to be here in the first place was a major blessing, not to mention only paying an eigth of what we should have been paying.  whatever the Lord has for us is fine by me.  We have learned to be content with little means in the past.  He has groomed us to be this way.

My relationship with Anna is going fan-tabulous!! She is the sweetest girl i have ever known and i am moved to tears to think that we may soon share our lives forever.  I want to thank you all for being great friends...you know who you are...and if you need anything you know who to talk to.  that is all gott to go.